


Now or Never

by parttimeficwriter



Category: Spooks | MI-5
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-17
Updated: 2018-03-17
Packaged: 2019-04-03 19:13:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,685
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14002767
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/parttimeficwriter/pseuds/parttimeficwriter
Summary: Set during episode 3.9 before it goes off into its own little universe of happiness.





	Now or Never

**Author's Note:**

> So, I’m not really sure where this story came from…
> 
> I was supposed to be working on the next chapter of Liar Liar II but the muse would not be swayed...
> 
> This is set at the end of episode 3.9 and then goes off in to a universe all of its own, as per usual!! Also, it was supposed to be a oneshot…that hasn’t happened either…I’m still typing on the second chapter and it appears to have taken on a life of its own – also as per usual!! Forgive me. 
> 
> All mistakes are my own. Harry and Ruth don’t belong to me but they would be far happier if they did.

Harry waited until Danny had walked off the Grid before turning his attention back to Ruth.

'I got the job,’ he said, quietly, unfolding the letter offering him the official position of Director General MI5. 

'Oh!’ Ruth gasped, trying to hide her disappointment, as she scanned the letter he had passed to her, ‘Sorry-um, congratulations Harry!' 

'Thank you. I didn't think I wanted the job but I'd rather it was me than a politician,' he confided with a grimace. 

'Yes, wow, DG,’ she murmured, swallowing back the wave of disappointment which flooded her at the realization that they would no longer work closely together. ‘When do you start?' 

'6 weeks,’ he answered, brusquely, ‘Look Ruth, I know you mentioned having plans but I'd like to discuss something with you. Perhaps you’d agree to discuss it over dinner?’ 

His request had caught her off guard he could tell but it appeared that she was pleasantly surprised if the light blush which suffused her cheeks was anything to go by. 

'Of course, I’ll just need to make a phone call,’ she explained, ‘It’s nothing that can’t be rearranged for another time.' 

'Good. That's good,’ he murmured, secretly relieved that she had agreed to drop her plans to spend the evening with him. ‘So, dinner?' 

'Yes, I'll ring my friend and then get my things together shall I?' she asked, reaching for her mobile. 

'Fine. Give me a nod when you’re ready and I’ll contact my driver.' 

-xxx-

It had taken less than thirty-five minutes to get from the Grid to a table in an upmarket restaurant with a glass of wine in front of each of them. Something Ruth wouldn’t have thought possible had she not witnessed it for herself. 

‘Congratulations again Harry,’ Ruth offered, shyly, raising her glass in a silent salute to his accomplishment. 

‘Thank you,’ he countered, tapping his glass lightly against her own before taking a mouthful. He looked at her intensely for a moment before breaking the stare and hiding behind his menu until the waiter arrived and he had no option but to hand it over. 

'Are you ok?' she asked, several minutes later when Harry had neither spoken to her nor looked her in the eye again. She was becoming increasingly confused and worried about his behaviour and began to wonder if he thought he had made a mistake in asking her to dinner.

'Hmm?' he responded, absently.

'We can go if you like?' she said, quietly, face flushing with humiliation.

'What? No!’ he answered, immediately, looking alarmed at the prospect of her leaving, ‘I'm sorry Ruth, I haven’t been very fair to you this evening so far,’ he paused and offered her a chagrinned smile, ‘in truth I have something important to discuss with you and I'm wondering how best to approach it.'

'Directly would be your usual tactic,’ she countered, tempering her reply with a wry smile to let him know that she didn’t mind his directness; or, at the very least, had become attuned to it.

His answering chuckle thawed the ice between them and he flashed her an apologetic grin. 'Yes, well, I'm not sure that will work on this occasion.' 

'It's not a return to GCHQ is it?!' she asked, alarmed. 

He smiled at her warmly, enjoying her continued aversion to the GCHQ mathematicians, ‘No Ruth, not GCHQ.' 

'What then?'

'I want you to marry me,’ he murmured, softly, eyes never leaving hers.

'What?!' 

Had there not been so much at stake he might have laughed at the look of shock on her face but, as it was, he realised that he’d better start talking. 'I told you the blunt approach wasn't a good idea,' he said, chagrinned. 'Can I explain?' 

'I think you have to!’ she said, taking a healthy glug of her wine to try and calm herself. 

'I know it's a shock and I'm sorry about that, I should have probably eased you in to this whole thing but I’m not very good at this kind of thing anymore’ he told her, feeling self-conscious, ‘I've wanted to ask you out for a long time now and, recently, I realised that my feelings for you are neither fickle nor are they going to be ignored for much longer. I had planned to ask you to dinner at the start of this week but first work got in the way and then the interview happened,’ he paused and took a drink of his wine, using the time to gather his thoughts. ‘Ruth, I'm going to be the DG in six weeks’ time,’ he reminded her, ‘and when I read that letter I realised that if I didn't do something now then any chance we might have had at a romance would be lost.' 

'I don’t understand. Why would it be?' she asked. 

He sighed and rubbed a hand across his forehead, ‘Well, aside from the fact that I’m considerably older than you, work too much, exercise too little and already have a failed marriage to my name; I'm your boss,’ he said, candidly, ‘which I suppose is bad enough in itself but in a few weeks, I'll be the head of the service and you'd likely be worried how it would look to your peers.' 

She couldn’t deny that there was truth to his logic but still failed to see how he had reasoned that a leap in to marriage was the only solution. 'So, your answer is to get married?' she asked, skeptically.

'Yes,’ he said confidently, ‘but it’s not as simple as that.'

'I'm fairly intelligent, Harry, but I think you're going to have to explain it to me a bit more because I’m not sure how a marriage of convenience is any better than being known as the boss’ girlfriend.' 

‘Firstly, you are the most intelligent person I have ever met,’ he countered, sincerely, ‘Also the most interesting, thoughtful and wonderful woman I know too as it happens. Secondly, I am not proposing a marriage of convenience. I wouldn’t insult you by offering you anything less than everything. I might be a bit rusty at all this and I’m buggered if I know how to say it all properly but, I love you Ruth,’ he paused to loosen his tie and undo the top button of his shirt. ‘How I feel about you isn’t going to change and, because of the timing and the vetting processes, I only have a small window of opportunity to make a go of it.’

'Are you serious?' she asked, after a few moments, still reeling from his impassioned declaration.  

'I've never been more serious, Ruth.' 

'Where would we live?' 

'Sorry? Are you agreeing?' he asked, face lighting up with hope.

'Not yet,’ she said, moving her wine glass out of her reach. She faced him with the same sincerity in her face as she did when dealing with complex matters in team briefings and he recognized that she had slipped in to analyst mode. ‘I need more information, Harry.' 

He nodded and reminded himself to keep his face as open as possible so that she would be able to read him. 'Well, as the DG I'd have to have a secure home address with certain safety features, most of which I already have installed at my house, so I would propose living in my house.' 

'Where would we marry?' 

'Anywhere you'd like to.' 

'Have you thought about marrying me before today?’ she asked, quietly, looking down at the table as she added, ‘before your hand was forced I mean.’

'Constantly,' he told her softly, reaching across the table and lifting her chin until she met his warm gaze. ‘I think about you all the time, Ruth.’

He was pleased to see her breath catch at his confession and watched with interest as her body flushed in response. 'There's so much we don't know about each other, Harry,' she whispered, caught in his gaze.

'That's your head talking,' he chastised her, lightly.

'I'm an analyst, Harry, I need information. It's who I am.' 

'I know that and I'm willing to tell you anything you want to know,' he murmured, reaching across the table and brushing his fingers against hers, ‘but what does your heart tell you?' 

'That you're a good man, that I can trust you,’ she said, feeling vulnerable but meeting his warm gaze, ‘That I can love you if I let myself.' 

He swallows hard and reaches for her hand. 'I will never hurt you,’ he vowed, ‘please, listen to your heart. Just this once.' 

'Ok.' 

'Ok?' he asked, heart beginning to thump wildly as his hope soared. 

'Yes, Harry. That's my answer, actually,’ she took a deep breath and laced her fingers with his, ‘Yes, I'll marry you.' 

Harry lifted her hand to his mouth, kissing her knuckles softly as he whispered, 'I’ll make you happy Ruth, I promise.' 

'There are some conditions though,' she warned, capturing his full attention.

'Go on.'

'You have to be faithful,' she said, solemnly.  

'We might not have been dating, Ruth but since I realised my feelings for you I haven't even looked at anyone else,’ he told her, truthfully, making her flush with warmth at the thought of holding his sole attention.

'You have to be honest with me, always,’ she raised her hand to forestall any objections before adding, ‘I’ll respect the limits of the job, Harry but you can be honest with me without giving away state secrets.'

'Agreed. I expect the same in return.' 

'Of course.' 

She was about to expand on her conditions when the arrival of the waiter curtailed their discussion. Harry waved him off, cursing the interruption. 'Come home with me,’ he suggested, ‘let me show you the house and then we can talk privately.'

'One more thing,' she added, seriously, 'then we can go.' 

'Alright. Go on.' 

'My cats have to live with us.' 

'Is that a deal breaker?' he asked, trying to keep a straight face. 

'Absolutely.'

'If they can behave and get on with my dog then I think we could all be very happy together!' 

TBC...


End file.
